Reply To: Chapter 11 thoughts

Ellen Saunders

Oh, the age of this book. Gah. Thank you so much for your comments at the end, Mr. Barnes. It’s been a bad couple of days and I needed the anchoring back in 2016. And, well, I’m over 50.

I encountered the concept of transmutation years ago, when I was an oversexed 30-something coming off a failed relationship. Or perhaps I found it in my 20s and only bothered working on it with sufficient willpower in my 30s. Anyway. I found it incredibly useful at the time, especially because I had chosen to be without a partner to get in touch with what I really needed out of a relationship. I used meditation, primarily, and a mental choice to use the energy of that sexual urge in other, primarily physical ways — although I could on occasion use it in writing. Moving a physical urge into an intellectual one is more difficult, but it works.

In other words, I use transmutation to *relieve myself of* my sexual desire, the way a priest or monk might.

Using it in a synergistic way to enhance both accomplishment and relationship is a novel concept to me.

I’m past menopause and both my desire and sense of personal attractiveness is nearly gone. I’ve burned up my occasional inappropriate attraction to others with transmutation, but it’s been awhile since I’ve even felt that. As my recent depression has lifted, desire has lifted its head a bit. Perhaps I should be tender to that fledgling urge and feed it while I learn to compound it.